damn gurl is u flappy bird bc nobody likes u
my mom went to high school with jamie lee curtis and one time they both got caught smoking pot together and jamie told the teacher it was my mom’s and my mom was suspended and jamie lee got no punishment so think about that next time you want some activia
the laxative yogurt lady fucked over my mom
- Britain: Excuse Me
- Netherlands: Excuseer me
- Mexico: Perdon
- Italy: Permesso
- France: Pardon
- Canada: Sorry
- America: Get the fuck out of my way douchedick
- Australia: Move cunt or I'll run you down with my kangaroo
Click here to watch Jon Stewart cover Kansas’s anti-gay legislation on The Daily Show.
And you can watch full episodes anytime, anywhere on the Comedy Central app.